Chiang Mai Chang
After leaving Bangkok to the ladyboys and OAPs it was off to Chiang Mai for a bit of culture and an escape from weirdosville. Decided against the 12 hour bus journey as I was still in holiday mood and a return flight for about 40 quid seemed much more convenient. Mind you that wasn't banking on bumping into the biggest bullshitter i've met this side of Blackpool at Bangkok airport. As with everyone i've met he seemed like a good lad at first, mind you once he told me he was from inbred Norwich I should've shifted seats there and then.
Checked into hotel after blagging a free ride with him from the airport and then nipped into the posher hotel pool next door for a bit of r and r (it had been a 1hour flight!). This is the first traveller I have met who is a save the world tree hugger type who looked permanently stoned and proceeded to tell me how he'd been arrested with 30 pills in Norwich 2 weeks ago and was out here whilst on bail for a month long trip. His aim was to buy lots of wood as he's a photographer you see and he thought he could ship loads of frames back and sell his holiday snaps at the Christmas markets. How romantic I thought whilst pondering the cost and practicalities of sending all this heavy shit back to England in time for the festive rush at Norwich market!
As the conversation continued he proceeded to have a number of tales to tell, including how he spent his first night in Bangkok smoking gear at a Tuk Tuk drivers mates house, how he had knocked out a couple of Scotsmen at a festival in the Summer (he didn't look like he could knock a wank out!), and how everything he seemed to do was ten times bigger or better than anyone elses life tales (Can you sense I was beginning to get ein bischen irritated here?). It culminated in his classic line " My hero is Robin Hood only I haven't found any poor people to give to yet!". That was the climax of his 68,000 pound department store scam that he managed simply by taking receipts back that he had produced in his dingy shed. Anyway needless to say 2 hours spent with him were interesting and after arranging to meet him outside in 5 for a wander I sharply legged it down the back stairs never to see him again (so far at least!). Am getting good at the disappearing trick.
Chiang Mai itself was pretty quiet bar the standard ladyboys and whores at every second turn but it was a welcome change from bustling Bangkok. Am still travelling with Ozzy lad and we booked some whitewater rafting and an elephant trek. Think the elephant had flu as it kept stretching it's beak back and sneezing on my ankle much to the drivers amusement, that was until he fell off it which I absolutely pissd myself at and that soon shut him up. Rafting was sehr gut and we were accompanied by a pair of German maidens whilst the other boat had one clueless Frenchman and 3 absolutely mental dutch guys in it (I would be thankful later that we'd chosen the frauleins). My pigeon German was received with giggles and approval by the 20 year olds (if that) who were taking a bit of a shine to me and Nick if truth be known, at one point one of them even asked if she could hold my paddle!
Rafting was brilliant and the 12 year old guide we had who had been chuckling earlier about the 6ft water snakes was an absolute legend. The Dutchmen and token frog weren't quite so lucky and bailed about 4 times. One of them who quite clearly knew where the fridge was, managed to get a pretty nasty gash on his leg which again the safety conscious local guides found fucking hilarious and so I thought it rude not to join in their laughter.
The night was topped off with my first real session of the trip and the 6.4% Chang local brew was going down a treat. Some standard Freel dancing ensued into the early hours and I bumped into a random Scotsman I met on the plane who unsurprisingly was quite keen on the schicker. Am now in Koh Samui after heading beachbound. Having a quiet couple of days before the lead up to carnage from Thursday onwards - full moon party on Sunday in Koh Phangan being the climax of the weekend!
After leaving Bangkok to the ladyboys and OAPs it was off to Chiang Mai for a bit of culture and an escape from weirdosville. Decided against the 12 hour bus journey as I was still in holiday mood and a return flight for about 40 quid seemed much more convenient. Mind you that wasn't banking on bumping into the biggest bullshitter i've met this side of Blackpool at Bangkok airport. As with everyone i've met he seemed like a good lad at first, mind you once he told me he was from inbred Norwich I should've shifted seats there and then.
Checked into hotel after blagging a free ride with him from the airport and then nipped into the posher hotel pool next door for a bit of r and r (it had been a 1hour flight!). This is the first traveller I have met who is a save the world tree hugger type who looked permanently stoned and proceeded to tell me how he'd been arrested with 30 pills in Norwich 2 weeks ago and was out here whilst on bail for a month long trip. His aim was to buy lots of wood as he's a photographer you see and he thought he could ship loads of frames back and sell his holiday snaps at the Christmas markets. How romantic I thought whilst pondering the cost and practicalities of sending all this heavy shit back to England in time for the festive rush at Norwich market!
As the conversation continued he proceeded to have a number of tales to tell, including how he spent his first night in Bangkok smoking gear at a Tuk Tuk drivers mates house, how he had knocked out a couple of Scotsmen at a festival in the Summer (he didn't look like he could knock a wank out!), and how everything he seemed to do was ten times bigger or better than anyone elses life tales (Can you sense I was beginning to get ein bischen irritated here?). It culminated in his classic line " My hero is Robin Hood only I haven't found any poor people to give to yet!". That was the climax of his 68,000 pound department store scam that he managed simply by taking receipts back that he had produced in his dingy shed. Anyway needless to say 2 hours spent with him were interesting and after arranging to meet him outside in 5 for a wander I sharply legged it down the back stairs never to see him again (so far at least!). Am getting good at the disappearing trick.
Chiang Mai itself was pretty quiet bar the standard ladyboys and whores at every second turn but it was a welcome change from bustling Bangkok. Am still travelling with Ozzy lad and we booked some whitewater rafting and an elephant trek. Think the elephant had flu as it kept stretching it's beak back and sneezing on my ankle much to the drivers amusement, that was until he fell off it which I absolutely pissd myself at and that soon shut him up. Rafting was sehr gut and we were accompanied by a pair of German maidens whilst the other boat had one clueless Frenchman and 3 absolutely mental dutch guys in it (I would be thankful later that we'd chosen the frauleins). My pigeon German was received with giggles and approval by the 20 year olds (if that) who were taking a bit of a shine to me and Nick if truth be known, at one point one of them even asked if she could hold my paddle!
Rafting was brilliant and the 12 year old guide we had who had been chuckling earlier about the 6ft water snakes was an absolute legend. The Dutchmen and token frog weren't quite so lucky and bailed about 4 times. One of them who quite clearly knew where the fridge was, managed to get a pretty nasty gash on his leg which again the safety conscious local guides found fucking hilarious and so I thought it rude not to join in their laughter.
The night was topped off with my first real session of the trip and the 6.4% Chang local brew was going down a treat. Some standard Freel dancing ensued into the early hours and I bumped into a random Scotsman I met on the plane who unsurprisingly was quite keen on the schicker. Am now in Koh Samui after heading beachbound. Having a quiet couple of days before the lead up to carnage from Thursday onwards - full moon party on Sunday in Koh Phangan being the climax of the weekend!
posted by Freely at 1:46 AM
1 Comments:
Pigeon German! Did that include Ich habe Durchfall by any chance?!
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