One way ticket to Smashville!

Well where do I start? Apologies that i've been missing in action for the last week or so but you know what the festive season's like and well quite frankly the booze has been calling far more persuasively than the net cafe.

Christmas eve provided the launchpad and there's pretty much been no looking back from then. We've been travelling in a group of 6 for a while and then John and Jodie pitched up on 29th to bolster numbers and so there's been some serious partying going on. Highlights include:

- Chatting up some Irish girls and telling Tobey to "Watch and learn, this is how you pull a minger!" only for Irish girl to hear and start swinging for me although the elusive Freel managed to avoid contact and even managed to talk my way out of the abyss

- Christmas Day treasure hunt - inspirational performance from myself and my Swedish buddy, setting tasks and clues all around Phi Phi for the girls to follow, eventually leading them to the viewpoint overlooking the whole island where we were waiting with presents, champagne and a picnic. - Beach footy - Myself, Francisco Totti, Jari Litmanen and Freddy Ljungberg taking on the Thai beach footy champs on Ko Lanta and whooping their asses 3 days running - have that 9 stone thai guys!

- Owning Krabi Town - We came, we saw, we conquered. Worked behind 3 different bars, job offers galore, legendary people in Blue Juice dive shop and a great way to bring in the new year! Just about pips the Duck in Clapham Junction last year!

Low points include:

- Visa run - Malaysia is beautiful, stepped into it for a whole 7 minutes after a 10 hour round trip squashed into a truck with a couple of tree hugging yanks - Groovy!

- Boat toilets - Absolutely reek, 20 hours waiting to drop the kids off. Think I may have permanent intestinal damage and after finally arriving on Phangan an hour ago have just blocked the bungalow bog with the longest whippet in world history!

- 4 in a bed - Never thought I would say this especially since 2 of them are gorgeous sisters but once the novelty had worn off squeezing 4 people into one double bed was not condusive to sleep and wouldn't be advised

- Tsunami memorial - Tears all over Phi Phi on Boxing Day as the 2 year anniversary was remembered. A sad day on the island that was left devastated by the giant waves.

Am now on Ko Phangan for my 3rd month in a row for one last EVER full moon blast out before the detox kicks in. Am off to buy an industrial tub of blue paint as we get set to go out in style fully clad in nappies, turbans and blue paint as the only 3 smurfs in Thailand!